To The Momma Barely Holding It Together

There seems to be a pattern here the past couple of days, that I can’t seem to shake myself out of. It’s 11:15, I SHOULD be trying to go to sleep so I am not super exhausted on the first day of school tomorrow. But, I just feel something so strongly on my heart that I cannot go to bed without sharing with you. Because if one woman reads this and feels not alone because of it, then I have done my job.
Like the title says: To the momma barely holding it together. I’m with you. I see you. I AM YOU.

These past couple of days have been purely insane. As it always feels like it is this time of year. Each morning I am hitting the ground running, trying to finish up everyone’s back to school orders with the boutique. Then when those are done for the day I am trying to get my own children prepared and ready for school. Oh, and in between all of that, you need to exercise, drink enough water, cook dinner, and maintain somewhat of a social connection with those around you.
I am tired.
Surviving on way too much coffee, and day 4 of dry shampoo. (Which is a new record by the way – thank you Lange.) 🙂
Each year that the night before school rolls around I picture it going differently. Each year I say that this is going to be the year that I am not “pulling it together” at the last second. We’re going to have a nice dinner, we’ll clean the kitchen, everyone will get their bath and go to bed by 8.
Can we all take a moment to laugh at that dream? Because in reality that is all that it is. At least for us, at least for our family in this current season we are in.
If you have it together and got all your kids in bed by 8 tonight, I am happy for you. Dare I even say, envy you a little. But that sentence right there is what I find myself feeling so convicted over tonight and why I feel so compelled to share.

We only see the highlights of peoples life. Yet, we feel like everyone else always has it so together. She got her shopping done weeks ago. She has cute little signs custom made for her kids. Every item that kid owns is monogrammed. It’s 9 and she’s sitting down reading a book and enjoying a glass of wine. She is so put together. They have it all, why can’t I do anything like that? Why is it 10:15 before my kids are finally going to bed? Why were we still buying school supplies 2 days before school starts? Why was I grocery shopping at 5:30 tonight, and still have the pantry goods sitting on my counter?

Comparisons can be rough. Maybe your life and your chapter looks nothing like your friends. But that doesn’t mean that one has it together and “right” and that you “don’t”. You have to do some searching, you have to put aside your emotions and the mom guilt, and truly see the good, the blessings, and how really “TOGETHER” your life actually is.

My kids went to bed late tonight, one because he was outside playing with his dog, and I chose to let him have a little care free moment before the demands of school set in.
One stayed up late because I know she is SO nervous to be starting middle school tomorrow, and her love language is quality time. So any little detail that she could work out with me sitting there at the counter with her, I know is what her heart and little mind needed tonight. I try to be sensitive to understand they are processing BIG emotions.
And one of them just walked out of her room and sat on the couch with me to talk about some waves at the beach. We both may be a little sleepy eyed tomorrow.

I “HAD” to go to HEB tonight or “GOT” to go? I am thankful that we are ABLE to buy the groceries that the kids need.

I had so much work to do this week? I am thankful for a thriving business and a God who provides all that we need.

I could list out all the negative, stressed out thoughts that I had this evening but you get the point. There is always something to be thankful for. The enemy comes to rob our thoughts, and steal our joy. Jesus comes to give us life, and give it ABUNDANTLY.

You are a GREAT mom. You are doing a GREAT job. Maybe your job looks a little different than her job. But God gave your kids YOU. Not her. They need YOU. In all of your imperfections and shortcomings, that’s where God’s grace can really shine through.

Be encouraged my friend. I’m here FOR you, and WITH you. <3